I don’t believe I’ve reviewed any self-help book at carp(e) libris reviews yet. But the opportunity came up recently to review one, and its focus on helping people who have been the target of discrimination is certainly something that could help many of us. Withstanding the Lie by father and daughter team Roger and Nicole Brewer is literally healing between the covers of a book. If you’ve ever experienced any sort of discrimination, whether it’s due to your race, religion, sex, size, physical ability, etc., and if that discrimination hurt you, made you hate, or somehow affected you so that you are unable to heal and move beyond it, then you’ll want to get a copy of Withstanding the Lie.
Both of the Brewers have experienced discrimination in their lives, but neither are bitter or hateful. They’ve learned how to move beyond the pain the incidents caused, and now they’re passing on their knowledge to others. I found the information insightful and sensitive. In fact, while reading the book I came up against a problem wherein I was able to apply something I was learning from the book. I was able to avert a situation that could have easily mushroomed into a hurtful experience for both me and the other person involved. While the Brewers are quick to let you know that fixing the hurt takes time, there is much to be learned from Withstanding the Lie that a reader will be able to apply to their life immediately.
Want to win your own copy? I have an extra right here.
3 Ways to Win:
1.) Leave a comment telling me if you’ve ever been discriminated against. How did it hurt you and did you try to do something to get over it? (There’s no need to tell us why you were discriminated against if you don’t want to.) Be thoughtful with your comment! Winners are randomly chosen, but if the name drawn doesn’t respond, I choose the next winner by comment.
2.) Email subscribers are entered into this and all future giveaways, for as long as their subscription is active. Simply place your email address in the little white box at the top of my sidebar on the right. (Please make sure to verify your Feedburner subscription by responding to the email they send you. If you don’t receive it, check your junk mail. Only verified subscriptions are entered for all the giveaways.)
3.) Blog about this giveaway on your blog with a link back to this post. Come back and leave me a Comment with a link to your blog post.
Do all three, and you’ve got three entries to win! You have until midnight EST on Thursday, October 2, 2008, to enter.
Check out the Withstanding the Lie website too.
I am white and endured legal abuse by some black people, including a cop, and while it’s fine to hear about blacks being discriminated, Asians, gays, etc., when a white person is discriminated, you never hear about it. So no, I haven’t gotten over it yet. Not until reverse discrimination is dealt with as well.
The one that’s always bothered me the most is being discrimintaed against because I’m female. Even in business, or in a car repair shop. I had money to spend and some men still talked to me as if I were stupid or told me to send in my husband. Grrrr Nothing I could do about but I’m disabled and and confined at home now and just as happy not to deal with it any more. I’d love to read this book. Please enter me.
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I don’t feel I was ever discriminated against.
I was discriminated from a job because of my sex. Even though they interviewed me and I felt that every went very well – I was more then qualified. But in the end they hired the male candidate.
I later asked for feedback and the company said that the male candidate would fit in better. I then found out there were 27 males working in the factory. Not one female on the floor.
I said what ever, and was glad I did not work there. This was in 1984.
Now I am a school teacher.
Pingback: Self-Help Book: Withstanding the Lie. A book on healing after discrimination. | Mom Giveaways
Yes slightly but I never did anything about it. Mechanics are bad. Chiropractic assistants can be a “pain” too
)
I am a white and female and at the time I was discriminated against for help because of that and was told get divorced or paint my skin dark- my husband is a disabled veteran so he was a hinderence as they say becauehe gets disability and makes too much haha..well I took care of what I needed but if I was an illegal or foreign in anyform I would have been welcomed with open arms. Would love to read this
I feel I have been discriminated because I am Middle classed, sounds funny, but I come from hard working middle classed family and have no insurance and when I have needed help, I have been told we make too much money, if my husband quits his job and gets a lower paying job or i get divorced, I can get help, butas things stand right now… no help. Self pay…Sucks!
no
never happened to me
I agree some whites are verbally abused by blacks in Canada and because i’m a french Canadian i have been
discriminated against because of my difficulty to speak English.
I don’t know if it counts as discrimination but I am a tall, bigger woman and it seems sometimes people pass judgements on me based on that. Thanks for the great giveaway.
Mary @ Adventures in Mommylands last blog post..Eco-Nursery Giveaway at Green Your Decor
Blogged it:
http://mommyland512.blogspot.com/2008/09/withstanding-lie-book-giveaway-at-carpe.html
Thanks again!
I have been discriminated against many times by Chinese people. The first time that I was aware of it was at a fruit stand when I was charged an outrageous price for some bananas. I went ahead and paid it but I cried as I left. Then another time I was in a market and I saw something I wanted to buy. I heard the man tell another Chinese customer that the price was “wu shi quai” (50). Then I asked in English how much it cost and he said 80. So I said “I thought it was wu shi quai??”
He wasn’t even embarrassed, he was just like, “Oh, you speak Chinese.”
I bet things like that have happened many times when I wasn’t even aware, but those were 2 times I caught on to what was happening.
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Hi, I have been made to feel different because of a large port wine birth mark on the left side of my face. I can remember almost every person that either questioned me about my face or as in high school, a boy who taunted me relentlessly. Thanks, Cindi
Mine is a little strange but I am often discriminated against because I am “the Pastor’s Wife”. People assume all sorts of (usually incorrect) things about me based on that information alone.
This happened to my mom, not me- My step-dad is a tall black man and my mom is a small white woman. They went out for supper one night in Seattle and the waiter wouldn’t serve them because they were a bi-racial couple. My step-dad (clearly more used to it than my mom) got up to leave but my mom freaked at the manager. The manager kicked them out. Brutal.
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Yes, i applied for a waitressing job, ( I think he thought i was too heavy) and i didnt get hired, so i asked the owner , after i seen they were all thin girls. and he offered me a job if i wanted it go figure.,but i got over it i was a little bit hurt. i didnt take the job.
I think I have been discriminated against because of my age (46). I have had a heck of a time finding a job where there are young girls working. I think it’s their mistake because I am a wonderful employee. The worst discrimination I have seen was as a teenager and working at a fast food restaurant. A black girl came in and put in an application. When she left the manager threw it away. He said nobody would eat there if we had a black employee. I was too young to fight it-but I would have a fit now!
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Have I ever been discriminated against? Every day, as I am blind the discrimination in the work place is horendous. It matters not how well educated one is, nor how much experience they may have, when you walk into an interview with a white cane the interview is over before it begins. I work on this issue every day as I direct the employment division of a center for independent living. Further the issue of “Its illegal” makes no difference in the real world.
The scariet thing is when discrimination becomes routine, and you hardly even notice it anymore – it’s something that’s so routine in society.
No, I don’t recall ever being discriminated against
Yes, years ago I was used as an example of what a “cheap” material is (printed fabric dress) versus a woven material. I felt I was being discriminated by being poor!
this looks like it would be a good read
Count me in!
Awareness and thoughtfulness will lead to appreciation of each others’ uniqueness and wonder!
I don’t think that I was ever discriminated against.
janetfaye (at) gmail (dot) com
I suspect that I have been discriminated against based on my marriage to my husband but I have no proof of it. There have just been so many instances where I feel people’s reactions were different than if I had been alone.
Thank you for having this! I have been discriminated against at a car dealership a few years ago. All because I was a woman. I kick myself now for standing up more but now I know and will deal with it differently if it happens again. Thank you
tatertot374@sbcglobal.net
I have been discriminated before at a job. I was told I would not get the job because I was a woman. I did not do anything about the discrimination initially. But eventually I did change jobs.
I grew up Catholic in a small, East Texas, predominantly Southern Baptist town. I was told by everyone (including my high school Texas History teacher) that I was going to hell because I was Catholic. I am still hurt by it, all these years later.
smalltownbeatnik at gmail
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People sometimes judge me by weight
In some form everyone on earth is discrimated against every day.
THanks for this timely prize and contest!
When I was in the 5th grade a girl slapped me because I was a different color than her friend. I was heart broken – I had never witnessed discrimination before.
Many years ago while living in the south, and working along side some in the NAACP, I was viewed as an “outside agitator from the north”. The anger and disgust toward me manifested itself with my windows being shot out and a smoke bomb thrown up under my carport. I saw what it was like to be viewed as “different”…and treated as insignificant.
At one time, I was married to an abuser. To this day, I still can’t tell you why I stayed almost 25 years in this relationship…but I did. This has produced many scars…some are physical, but the ones that remain are not the visible kind of wounds.
From Diane’s description, I know this book would be of great benefit for me. I’m having surgery again on Oct 8…so if I win this, it’s going to the hospital with me. It sounds like a great read.
Kindest Regards,
Kathryn
I don’t encounter discrimination but it is cruel and unjustified. Thanks for this giveaway.
I am asian and have been discriminated against. I often hear people trying to copy our accents. Its not easy to learn a new language. How would you like it, if French people made fun of your Canadian accent in francais. It doesn’t bother me as much because I don’t have an accent, but it’s hurtful for my parents.
I don’t feel I was ever discriminated against, which is a good thing.
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Of course! Based on my size, skin color (Vitiligo), race/ethnicity (being multiracial).
I come from a mixed racial background and have personally experienced discrimination. I have learned to get through it by my faith in God.
Oh yes, I’m a very overweight white woman. I went to the doctor about an allergy problem – dermatitis once, and she honestly acted disgusted by my weight. She kept telling me how fat I was, even when I told her I realized that, and that yes, I knew what a calorie was, I was an RN afterall – she was a young, fairly new skinny doctor, and I strongly got the impression that she could not stand fat people. I had to remind her to look at my dermatitis, and then she did not even offer me any treatment or anything. Nothing! And it was terrible! She was just like “well you are just going to have to lose some weight. You don’t want to be that fat.” Gee, thanks lady.
I used to live overseas, and while it wasn’t something that happened all the time I was discriminated against because of my nationality and color. It wasn’t fun, and made you feel like crap. There wasn’t anything different about you really than any one else, but because you weren’t from there some didn’t think you belonged.
I’d love to enter this giveaway. The book sounds moving. Thank you.
RebekahC
littleminx at cox dot net
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P.S. I am a subscriber.
Thanks!
RebekahC
littleminx at cox dot net
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Yes, I have been, unfortunately. I’m one of those people who lives in a “bubble” so to speak — meaning that i KNOW that discrimination happens, but I never thought that it’d happen to me personally.
I’m Chinese, and at a grocery store, a lady told me to “go back to my country”. My first reaction was shock, as this person supposedly has a PhD and apparently works at an Ivy League school. And just because I’m chinese does NOT mean that I’ve just arrived from a village where I earn my living working the paddy fields, nor does it mean that I’m uneducated or dumb or an idiot.
I got really upset after I left the store and started crying (i blame it on the pregnancy hormones!) My husband, who was with me, got really angry at that lady and drove back to the store, and confronted her, met up with her more level headed husband and he apologized.
I guess my lesson learned was that just because someone is educated does not mean that they are free from narrow-mindedness.
As to whether I’ve gotten over it, it depends. There are times where I’d be reluctant to go out of the house because I’ll be forever wondering, is that person over there thinking that I don’t have a right to be here? What about that person standing over there? And other days, when I’m more “fiesty” I’d like to be able to meet that lady again and give her a piece of my mind.
no I don’t feel I’ve been discriminated against
I do not feel that I have been discriminated against.
I have been the victim of discrimination. i still have not fully gotten over it. It made me feel that you cannot trust anyone. I felt anger but not wanting yo be violent but I wanted to do something about it or tell someone but I did not have the resources to do so.
Yes, I felt discriminated because I was a woman. It made me work harder.
I subscribed
by doctors because of my weight!
My son is gay and I have heard some outright stupid comments and questions, concerning my son. This is my child, who I will love to the end of my time. Being a military brat, I tell people, my father and father-in-law, gave almost 50 years between them to give you the right to have your opinions and lifestyle and my son is included in that. I will listen to what you believe, with respect and I expect to get the same in return, but I will not debate or listen cordially if you are going to berate my son on a regular basis.